Crisis of Masculinity?

I'm not sure how I feel about Piper's recent pronouncements. Part of me feels relieved. The colours have finally been nailed to the mast; really there is no uncertainty any more; being male is better than being female. On the other hand I am just totally worn down by it all.

However, it did lead me to think that I'd write down what I often explain verbally to people as my analysis of why there are more women in the church than men because we have to be honest, there are. And though I may fundamentally disagree with Piper et. al. we should all be asking ourselves what the causes may be if any demographic group is under-represented in our churches.

So here's my take on it:

To become a Christian you must:
1.) Admit that you have been wrong
2.) Repent
3.) Invite Christ to be Lord of your life

The social construct of femininity includes:
1.) Being weak or uncertain
2.) Being wrong
3.) Looking to others for guidance

The social construct of masculinity includes:
1.) Being strong and certain
2.) Never admitting defeat
3.) Being in control

No wonder then there are less men in the church, becoming a Christian means they have to compromise their masculinity.

But it is not the message that has to change but the construct we currently have of what it is to be male (and female for that matter). And the message so powerfully challenges that construct...the life of Jesus certainly challenges it.

What really saddens me about these discourses is the many times I've heard Christians ask where are the men? The real men? the Alpha men? While all the thoughtful, tender, emotional, beautiful men in the church stare quietly into their coffee and feel inadequate.

I'd just like to take this moment to thank all the amazing Christian men I know who are secure enough in God to be confident in who they are and not to care what others think they should be. There's one in particular who I adore, who spends an enormousness amount of time studying the Sermon on the Mount, who would feel as uncomfortable and ill at ease in a 'masculine' Christianity as I would.

People aren't born in boxes. Why do we insist on trying to put them in?